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Online Dating — Managing Narcissism and Gaslighting

Lenore T. Rose
9 min readJul 11, 2023

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Photo by Marija Zaric on Unsplash

BDSM relationships are built on trust. Trust is considered, for many, the number one, most important quality of their relationship. Considering the significance of “trust,” — is Bob even practicing BDSM, or is it something else?

One reason I write about Bob is that he represents a large portion of men lurking online. The hashtag #DontDateBob reminds you that these guys are not what they appear to be. Second, my kink writing has always been geared toward having a healthy, quality relationship before the kink. Regardless of your choice of monogamy or polygamy — a “healthy interactional relationship” comes first.

Most of us have moved to dating online. Our lives are so busy that it is the only outlet for many. While it has become the norm, reminding ourselves to proceed safely in the technological age of love is still fundamental. While you are doing everything you can to protect yourself, the fact is that there are many, many guys (and gals) just like Bob out there. Their only interest in you — is getting what they want. Many are narcissists and use gaslighting and other manipulative techniques. You’ve likely heard of these terms, but what are they, and how do you protect yourself from getting involved with someone who doesn’t have your best interest in mind?

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Lenore T. Rose
Lenore T. Rose

Written by Lenore T. Rose

Creative spirit. Overworked human. Idea developer. Poet. Artist. Animal rescuer.

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